Romance Or Not? Mary Middleton discussing the lack of distinction between love stories and sexual adventures.

Is it just me or does anyone else think that the romance genre could do with a bit of a shake up?  It used to be safe to pick up something with a ‘Romance’ tag because the reader knew she could expect a love story with maybe some rather steamy bedroom scenes thrown in. That was fine. But recently it has become more and more easy to inadvertently select things that are more akin to ‘pornography’ than ‘romance’.

I picked up a book the other day with a three star heat rating, which to my calculation in a one to five star scale, should categorise it as ‘mild to warm’. It should not have much in it to shock a woman of my age, but from page one it was rough, hard and fast sex, with a total stranger, in fact as I read on, his best pal joined in too. Very good friends, obviously. 

I stuck with it for a while hoping it would get better but when I discovered very little plot or character development or point to it really, I put it down again. The book had several good reviews, no explicit content warning or anything to suggest it wasn’t a run of the mill romance.  With the covers of softer romances becoming steamier and the content of the harder romances (I use the term loosely) becoming more imaginative, the margins are now becoming so blurred that the reader doesn’t know what to expect.

Often, when I tell people I write ‘romance’ they assume a suggestive expression, look at me sideways, ‘Oh, yes?’ they say, imagining me bashing away at my keyboard turning out a literary equivalent to Debbie Does Dallas. That isn’t the image I particularly want to cultivate and I am sure that goes for alot of other romance writers.

Now I guess you are all thinking, 'That Mary Middleton is a bit of a prude,' but that honestly isn’t the case. I just like to know roughly what is in store when I open a book and I would guess I am not alone. It’s rather like opening ‘Hello’ magazine and finding it filled with hard porn photos.

To me the difference between the two is that ‘Romance’ makes you smile softly and the stuff at the opposite end of the spectrum is more likely to make you wince.  There is the ‘heat’ rating, I suppose but I’m not sure it is working as well as it once did. I sense a shift in people’s expectations and sensibilities and what was once considered ‘saucy’ now seems to be categorised as ‘sweet’ and what once was considered ‘hot’ has now become ‘mild.’  My ex mother in law loves the old fashioned, pastel covered romances and I wonder how long it is before she picks up something new and is shocked to the marrow by it. I think publishers need to make things a little bit clearer and remember that old ladies like to read love stories too.

I suppose it’s all subjective but it seems quite clear to me that the romance tag should encompass love, and sex if you like, within a loving relationship. Sexy stories outside of that setting, especially if it is kinky or violent or involving many partners, should be categorised as something else, just so the reader knows. I am not calling for a ban or anything like that and I realise that many people enjoy the hotter end of the scale, I am just calling for a clearer distinction to be made between the two. I am sure when a fan of five star heat rated accidently selects a three star they are as equally disappointed at the content.

My own romances have plenty of sex in them but since I am consiously writing about everlasting, wonderful, unbeatable LOVE in capital letters, you can pick up one of my novels safe in the knowledge that  it will not be centered on sex for sex's sake but on the precious gift of  lasting love.

Coming  Soon to  Amazon Kindle